Seeping Matter

Every soul that comes to this earth is born with their own set of talents.  It is our marvelous opportunity as parents to tell our children what their talents are, and get them to develop the correct talents and ignore their natural talents if necessary, in order to plan for our retirement.

So you can imagine my absolute joy and relief to see this awesome sight and capture it digitally:  My son, Oakley, slam-dunking a basketball.  Now I know some of you are doing to hate on this, noting that the rim is not all the way up, but rather sitting down at about 8 1/2 feet.  So he can only dunk at 8 1/2 feet for now – big deal.  We’ll see about a 10 foot rim when he turns 2.

Note:  This image Copyright © 2009 Matt Ryan

Watch and learn, my children.

I manage the Mozy Windows Client engineering team, and not long ago I sent out a meeting request that began thusly:

Guys,
We shipped 1.12, which means we are awesome, and shipping 1.12 and being awesome is something worth celebrating.

Now, before all you fairer readers get offended, I’m allowed to address my local team with “Guys” because all of them happen to be men, which is NOT the case with my extended team (hey Seattle peeps).

Anyway, I took my team to the movie today to celebrate releasing Mozy 1.12, and being awesome.  Most of my team chose to see “Taken,” but Pancho preferred to see “Race to Witch Mountain,” and since I didn’t care and didn’t want Pancho to be alone, I went to see that movie with him.

And it wasn’t bad.  For one thing, it has The Rock in it.  The Rock’s screen name is Dwayne Johnson, and he is one of the greatest actors ever, where “greatest” means “biggest and strongest.”  In case he reads this blog, let it be known:  The Rock, you RULE!  Freaking RULE!  Please don’t beat me up!

However, I hadn’t realized that you would have to know so much about the computer game Starcraft in order to understand “Race to Witch Mountain.”  And this may also make the movie more geeky and make more geeky people want to watch it.  Plus, probably a lot of them will wonder why the movie seems to be poking fun at the space alien convention – but that is another story.

Anyway, here’s the lowdown:

• Sara and Seth are aliens from outer space.  But they don’t look like aliens.  This means they are obviously Terrans.
• When everyone consults with a space alien expert, he describes aliens as “praying-mantis-like.”  It is apparent that he is only familiar with Zerg aliens, and assumes that since Zerg are aliens, therefore all aliens are Zerg.  Which is a reasonable assumption to make, although anyone familiar with Starcraft knows how false this is.
• There is also another alien.  Now I don’t mean to spoil the movie, so let me just say he’s an assassin trying to kill Sara and Seth, and that is pretty much the whole plot.  I probably spoiled it.  Eh.  Anyway, by the end of the movie it is quite clear that this alien is a Protoss.

So if you are thinking about going to see “Race to Witch Mountain” (which you should, so The Rock doesn’t hunt you down and beat on you), you should read about Starcraft first – and then you’ll be ready to fully enjoy the movie.

Oh, and by the way – if you know C and C++ and are awesome, you should talk to me about working at Mozy.

My people, there is an epidemic.  It is serious and problematic.  We must take action to address this epidemic.  The epidemic is US Congressional Dumbness.

Now, some people, like Orrin Hatch, are beyond saving.  He is simply too dumb to be helped.  He is a lost cause and will unfortunately continue to infect other US congresspersons with Dumbness.  Our only hope here is to try to contain, minimize the damage, and hopefully quarantine these poor experienced congresspersons with Advanced Dumbness, like Senator Hatch, from the rest who may not yet be infected, or may only be experiencing Early Stage Dumbness.

Evidence of this disease abounds.  One example of such evidence is the recently enacted CPISA which, among other things, made off-highway vehicles targeted toward youth aged under 13 ILLEGAL – not because they are unsafe, but because they contain too much lead.

I do admit, there have been countless times since I bought my KX 250 5 years ago when I’ve gone out to look at it and found my children sucking on it.  I softly and gently tell them, “ARE YOU INSANE?!?  DON’T YOU KNOW THAT THING HAS LEAD IN IT?!?  ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL YOURSELF?!?  HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU NOT TO SUCK ON MY MOTORCYCLE?!?!?”  This might be why my kids tend to walk into walls and accidentally stab themselves in the eye with a fork while eating.

Nevertheless, this is no excuse for outlawing children’s off-highway vehicles.  I want freedom for myself and my children, even if it means my children are free to break into the motorcycle shed and gnaw on the exhaust pipe.  Being patriotic, I decided I should fight this disease in this case and write my congresspersons.

Here is the context of the e-mail I sent:

Dear [congressperson]:

I wish to express my concern about some of the unintended effects of CPISA that recently went into effect; namely, the restriction on youth-oriented off-highway vehicles targeted by section 101(a) of that act.

Motorcycle and ATV riding is a very popular family activity in our state, a family activity now threatened by this act.  Because of the popularity, this act will also have a very real economic impact on our state.  And speaking personally, this act threatens the sports of Motocross and Supercross, some of the fastest growing spectator sports in the country and a favorite of my father, brother, sons, and myself, because it chokes the pipeline of new talent being introduced to the sport.

While these impacts are very real to Utah, Utah is not the only state affected by this obvious oversight.  Little children do not generally bite, chew, or suck on motorcycles and ATVs, so the health risk from lead contamination to children from these vehicles is small to non-existent, and not even worth discussing.

I hope you will agree with me and do your best to have this situation addressed so that my children, and children all across the country, are free again to participate in this sport.  I look forward to hearing back from you on your success in this endeavor.

You too can help fight US Congressional Dumbness in this case.  To do so, simply go to this website of a US Congressmen who seems free of the disease and send in the form.

Time for yet another update on the experiment.  I’m getting a lot of slack for this right now because we seem to have hit a local minima.  But I shall forge onward!  Onward!

Current standings:

• Current Artist – Album – Song:  Enya – Amarantine  – Drifting
• Songs listened to:  2264
• Total songs:  9544
• Percentage complete:  23.72%
• Estimated completion:  July 2010

I fell off the pace this month, because they made me the Windows DevLead at Mozy, and Luis was here one week, which was the same week we were wrapping up a major deliverable, and I don’t think I actually listened to any music that whole week, at least not at work.  And because I didn’t listen to any music that week, that explains why it will now take me two months longer to finish. (?)

Anyway, Drowning Pool was a great new discovery over the past month.  That will definitely be listened to again.  Also, Angie Newman Hull became the first, and still only, winner of my ongoing Facebook contest.  This gave me great hope for future contests, but we haven’t had any further winners, although some people seem to be participating more again.

I also listened to The Eagles and Elton John this month.  Bo-ring.

So the goal for this month is to get to the Fs.  Eric Johnson should be a decently good time, if I don’t get bored of his style, which I might after enough of it, but you have to admit he’s pretty awesome.  Once we get to the Fs, it still looks a bit bleak for the rest of the month, but Faith No More is in the Fs, and that should be good.  And Falco!  Don’t forget Falco!

‘Til next time…

Image credit: amazon.com

It’s been almost two years since Guitar Hero II came out for the XBox 360.  I know this because that is pretty much why I bought one.  That, plus I was working at Novell at the time, and our project had just been cancelled again, so I was kinda bummed, and I needed to blow a lot of money to feel better about myself.

Amber said yes, and I was pretty stoked.  So I bought myself and XBox 360 from BestBuy.  I’d heard about the now-famous Red Ring Of Death, so uncharacteristically I decided to pay for the extended warranty.

Unsurprisingly, our XBox 360 eventually decided to sport the Red Ring Of Death – a fate, much like real death, that is unavoidable for older XBoxen.  What is pretty amazing about this experience is that ours chose to manifest the Red Ring Of Death about one month before the warranty expired.

Really.  That is pretty incredible.  That’s how I know it has been almost two years since Guitar Hero II came out.

Microsoft, I hear, has been pretty cool about handling this Red Ring Of Death thing, and since my machine was less than two years old I figured I could get Microsoft to replace it.  But then I remembered having purchased the extended warranty.  So I took it in to BestBuy today to see if they would replace it.

(By the way, can you guess what the customer service associate typed into the “Reason for Return” field on the return form when I brought back my XBox 360?  ”Red Ring Of Death.”  I don’t know if that is funny or embarrassing.)

So here’s what happened:

• On April 6, 2007, I purchased my XBox 360 from BestBuy for $399.
• Some time ago, Sadie gave one of my XBox 360 controllers a drink of orange juice.  It got heartburn and never recovered.  After that, we let Oakley play with it since it was completely non-functional.
• Last night I packaged up the XBox 360, with all the accessories and the non-functional controller, to take back to BestBuy.
• Today they gave me a brand new one, which means:
  • My new XBox 360 has a 60 GB hard drive instead of a 10 GB hard drive.
  • My new XBox 360 has an HDMI output where the other did not.
  • My new XBox 360 came with two new video games where the other did not.
  • My new XBox 360 comes with a brand new manufacturer’s warranty – clock reset.
  • My new XBox 360 only costs $299. So I got also got a sweet BestBuy gift card for the difference, which I am thinking might be well used to buy something like Fable II.

Yeah, this Red Ring Of Death thing ended up being pretty sweet.  I completely upgraded my XBox 360, got some new games, a new controller, and reset the factory warranty for, uh, negative $40?  Sweet.

Only bad thing:  I lost all my old saved games, because I can’t figure out how to save them to a memory stick.  Am I a doofus, or is it just not doable on the XBox 360?  It seems like a software engineer should be able to figure that out.

Oh well.  It is a small price to pay for such a sweet deal.  I’m looking forward to 23 months from now, when hopefully my XBox 360 will Red Ring Of Death again.

Last Friday’s running of the Daytona 200 was our first glimpse at the new AMA Pro Racing as managed by the Daytona Motor Group.  Regular readers of my blog will recall my scepticism when the DMG originally announced their plans to “improve” the series.

This year’s revised Daytona 200 was a mixed bag at best.  Attempts to make that class (whatever it was called) more competitive only partially succeeded.  The Buells were surprisingly fast, well-mannered, and competitive compared to the Japanese bikes, much more so than in previous years in Formula Extreme.  However, the other makes, like Aprilia, Ducati, and Triumph, were merely aslo-rans.  Time will tell whether those race bikes can also be competitive – where “time” in this case could mean several seasons.

They also chose to run the race at night under lights.  This was done presumably to increase attendance, I guess, or for TV reasons; I can’t imagine why else they would do it, because it surely doesn’t make for a better racing experience.  Then, about halfway through the race, when Josh Hayes had a healthy six-second lead, that lead was erased when some lights in the upper part of the rear grandstand went out, presumably creating an “unsafe racing condition” and bringing out the yellow flag.

See, the DMG is all about avoiding “unsafe racing conditions.”

So while they were circling the track, under yellow for safety reasons due to an unsafe racing condition, one of the riders couldn’t see well and ran into a slower rider at a fairly high rate of speed, leaving that rider writhing in pain against the wall on the back straight.  So much for holding a caution period in order to make things safer.

Note, this all started because they decided to hold the race at night.

Actually, not true.  This all started when the DMG took over AMA Pro Racing.

How many times have you recounted an experience or confrontation to someone else, and as you are telling the story, you realize out loud, “You know what I should have said?  I should have told them…” and then you get a good laugh about it?  And then you go back and forth, figuring out even better ways to really put those other people in their place, and let them know what you really think!  And boy, is it funny!

Well, I must admit I’ve lost track of the number of times.  Last I remember it was about 323 or something.  I don’t know how high it is now.  And neither do you.  Stop counting.

Anyway, doing this helps you to practice for next time, so those witty sayings or sharp remarks are sitting there, right in your subconscious, ready to fly out next time, so you don’t have to even think about it.  Then afterwards, you won’t have to discuss what you should have said – you can discuss what you did say, and be the envy of all your friends.

I learned this today when I was at the store with my family.  We were waiting in line to buy some shoes.  We’d been waiting in line for quite a while and had been at the mall for probably two hours.  I was ready to go home.  We waited until we were next in line, and just as the people in front of us were finishing their purchase, another lady with her teenage daughter stepped up to the register with her shoes.  When the people in front of us left, this lady and her daughter stepped right in ahead of us and put their shoes on the counter.

All those years of practice paid off.  I thought, ‘There’s no way I’m going to let them just cut in front of me in line like that.  I’m gonna say something.’ And I did.  I said, “You must be in more of a hurry than I am.”

Yeah, I really did.  In front of my wife and my children.

As soon as it was coming out I realized that I really didn’t want to be rude, so I tried to smile and make it seem like I was trying to be lighthearted about it.  But it didn’t work.  The lady and her daughter were really embarrassed.  I could tell I’d really hurt them with that remark.  Of course, it was also embarrassing to my wife.  And I was embarrassed that I’d allowed myself to act that way.

I’m ashamed to say that I also didn’t wait to apologize to her afterward.  I wish I had stayed just outside the store and told her that I really wish I hadn’t said that and that I am sorry.  But I didn’t do that either.

I don’t know where I developed such a disdain for people.  I don’t know why I would speak like that to a person that Jesus Christ died to save.  I don’t know why I would automatically assume the worst about another person; surely I don’t actually think she would intentionally do that.  The only thing I can think of is that it came from all those years of practice, coming up with really good ways to get at other people.

It is a harsh awakening, realizing you are a jerk – not just kind of a jerk, but a real, disdainful, unfriendly, example-of-what-is-wrong-with-society kind of jerk.  I don’t like that version of myself.

So I’m going to try not to do that anymore.  From now on I’m going to try to assume the very best about people, and when I have that conversation with my friends afterwards, I’m going to try to figure out how much nicer I could have been than what I was.  I’m going to try to remember that every human soul is valuable and deserves the best kindness I can muster.  And hopefully that lady and her daughter will somehow know that I’m sorry.  Maybe she reads my blog.

Eek – forgot to do the positions log last Friday, and now I have to pay for it by accounting for this huge market dip this week in last month’s activity.  Oh well.

AAPL:
Long 1 JAN11 100 Call

AEMD:
Long 17000 shares

AMZN:
Long 1 MAR09/JAN11 65/50 Diagonal Spread

CTSH:
Long 2 JAN11 15 Call

GLD:
Short 2 APR09 100/101 Vertical Call Spread
Long 1 JAN11 50 Call
Long 1 JAN11 75 Call

GME:
Long 1 MAR09/JAN11 25/20 Diagonal Spread

NOV:
Long 1 AUG09 20 Call

RIMM:
Long 1 JAN11 30 Call

SPY:
Long 2 MAR09 73/75/91/95 Iron Condor
Long 2 MAR09 74/76/90/93 Iron Condor
Long 2 MAR09 78/79/90/92 Iron Condor
Long 2 MAR09 78/80 Vertical Put Spread
Long 4 APR09 65/66 Vertical Put Spread
Long 2 APR09 70/71 Vertical Put Spread

UA:
Long 1 MAR09/APR09 12.5/25 Diagonal Spread

Net profit (loss) this month:  (9.8)%
Net profit (loss) YTD:  (4.7)%
Net profit (loss) lifetime: (40.5%)

See that word “Long” all over the place up there?  That’s why I lost money this month.  I had negative delta on SPY going into last month, but didn’t carry that negative delta over into the upcoming expiration, and now I’m paying for it.

This is correctable though, although probably not right away.  But I can start selling call premium on SPY, even though it is so low, to get my delta back to a good place.  Then we’ll see how the coming months fare.

Mozy is hiring.  I mean, Decho is hiring.  Decho is the silly name given to replace the awesome of Mozy.  We still call it Mozy, we can’t help it.

Anyway, we’re hiring.  Specifically, my team, the client team, is hiring.  And since Mozy decided to make me the manager of the Windows client team, that means I’m participating in the interviews.  This is stressing me out, because I feel like I am deciding the fate of people.

The process of getting hired at Mozy (arrgh, Decho) goes something like this:

• Apply and submit a resume.
• If we like your resume we will do a phone interview.
• If you do well in the phone interview we will bring you in for on-site interviews.
• If you do well in the on-site interviews we will assign you a homework assignment.
• If you do well on the homework and you are the best candidate we have for the position, there’s a decent chance you’ll get an offer.

Development work at Mozy is primarily done in C++.  Objective-C on the Mac side.  Pretty much you have to know C and C++ and/or Objective-C to get a development job, unless you want to work for the web team, using Ruby.  But those guys are kinda weird.  They sit on a different floor in the building and everything.  We’re not talking about those guys.

So during the phone screen, we ask you to rate yourself on C++.

We explain the rating scale like this:  0 means you are my father, waiting for this computer fad to go away, and you haven’t really heard of C++.  1 means you wrote Hello World in C++ once, and might be able to do it again today.  On the other end of the scale, 10 means your name is Bjarne Stroustrup, or maybe Herb Sutter or Andrei Alexandrescu.  9 means you have written books on C++; 8 means you could write a book on it, or teach courses on it.

Please, people.  Do not flatter yourself on the C++ scale.

I interviewed with Google once, over the phone.  They asked me this same question with pretty much the same scale, except they made no mention of my father.  I told them I was a 6 or a 7.  And I actually have taught courses on C++.

Lately we’re asking people this question and invariably we’re getting people saying, “Oh, based on that scale, I’m a 7 or an 8.”  Even kids in college.  Now I’m not saying that kids in college can’t be a 7 or an 8 – just, keep in mind, we’re not seeing a lot of true 7′s or 8′s among experienced professionals.  I’m just sayin’.

When you say in your interview, “I’m a 7 or an 8,” what you are telling me is this:  “I know C++ better than you.”  Now, you don’t probably know me personally, so hey, maybe you are better.  All I’m saying is, you’d better be ready to prove it when we bring you on-site.

For example, you’d better know at least most of this stuff:

• How to define a template class
• How to correctly define the assignment operator for a class
• How to overload the insertion and extraction operators for a class you define
• How to iterate over an STL vector
• Whether ++i is better, worse, or the same as i++, performance-wise, and why
• What methods the compiler will create for you if you don’t create them yourself, and the implications of this
• How to indicate in your developer contract whether a class is meant to be subclassed, which methods are overrideable, and how you insist that only subclasses can be instantiated
• How to specify default values for parameters

If you are a 7 or an 8, you probably should have read most of “The C++ Programming Language” and/or “Effective C++” and/or “Advanced C++” and/or a number of equivalents.  Having read “Design Patterns” would certainly help, although lately those have kinda lost their glimmer and so I don’t weigh on those like I used to.

Also:

• What const and mutable mean

Yeah.  const.  Don’t be like the self-proclaimed C++ expert I worked with at Enterasys Networks, who told the whole company he was the go-to guy for C++ questions, who, when asked, “Why does it say const after this method declaration?” replied, “Oh, they just do that a lot in C++; it doesn’t mean anything.”  Yeah.  Don’t be a doofus.

Don’t try to impress me by saying you are a 7 or an 8 if you aren’t.  Really – you don’t have to be a 7 or an 8 to get a job at Mozy (Decho…hrm).  If you say, “Oh, I’m probably a 5,” that tells me you are a good, solid C++ dude (or dudette, whatever) that knows how to write decent C++ applications.  You’ll probably get asked to come in for an interview anyway.

When we bring you in, it is my job (and Cody’s) to figure out how much of C++ you really know.  We will start out at the point you specified and go from there.  If you are really a 5 or a 6, but you said 7 or 8, you will feel like we’re being very brutal on you.  Hey, you are the one who said you knew your stuff.

Oh – one more thing.  Some of you experienced hires don’t think you should have to go through all of this to get a job with us.  Well, we make the rules.  Every one of us that works there has gone through it.  If you think the rules of Monopoly are dumb, nobody’s gonna think bad of you if you decide not to play.  But if you want to play but not follow the rules, well, don’t be too surprised if people take issue with that.  If you’re gonna try to work at Moz – uh, Decho, at least for my team, just go through the process like everyone else.

Okay, I feel better.  Whew.  Oh, and by the way, if you really are a 7 or an 8 (or better), I have a link for you.