Seeping Matter

When I first heard about our country’s new CARS program, my reaction was, “Hey!  Free money if I trade in my Durango for a new SUV!  Despite the dumb name, this seems like an excellent plan!  Almost too good to be true!”

Of course, that should make us stop and think about it.

And I have.  I have some problems with this new plan.  I get the sales pitch:  Make it easier to buy a new, more fuel-efficient vehicle.  Help out the auto makers by increasing sales.  Help out the environment by replacing a number of higher-pollution vehicles with lower-pollution vehicles.  Reduce our oil dependency by replacing a number of less efficient vehicles with more efficient vehicles.  And I get a new car.  Everybody wins!

Well, I do have a number of problems with it.

I have a nomenclature problem.  I don’t understand why we have to come up with a cute little acronym name for this program.  It is also known as “Cash for Clunkers,” which is equally dumb.  My 1998 Durango, which definitely qualifies for the full $4500 rebate, has been a great vehicle for me, runs quite well, and is definitely not a clunker by my definition.  This lets you know what sort of vehicle standards the folks in Washington have, and how disconnected they are from the world in which their constituents live.

I have a fundamental problem.  It should not be the place of the government to get involved in consumer affairs like this.  We’ve had a lot of ever-increasing government intervention in society over the last 60+ years, but rarely has this intervention actually done any good; often it hurts more than it actually helps.

I have a financial problem.  Where does all of this money come from?  Well, ultimately it has to come from the pockets of the taxpayers, either in increased taxes or in increased prices due to inflation caused by printing money to cover it.

I have a principle problem.  Taking a perfectly good, functioning vehicle and scrapping it is flat-out wasteful.  There’s this part of my being that screams out that we can’t expect a net good to come from a plan that isn’t founded in solid principles.

I have an economics problem.  Junking these cars will have an inflationary effect on the general price of cars.  It’s simple supply and demand.  Given a closed ecosystem with 100 car owners with one car each, suppose 10 are new and 20 qualify for the CARS program.  Under normal conditions, we might assume that twenty people are buying a car each year, half of them are buying new and half are buying used, and so ten cars are cycling through the ecosystem per year.  Now you inject CARS into the mix.  There will be people participating who might normally not have bought this year at all, or who might have bought this year but would normally have bought used instead of new.  If half of the 20 participate, and half of those would not have normally bought this year at all, that means instead of 10 new cars entering the ecosystem we have 18, if my math is right.  To balance it, there must be 18 older cars leaving the ecosystem instead of the normal 10.  What you end up with is fewer used cars — 82% are used instead of 90% — and the average car value has gone up.  But note that, at best, the economic condition of the people in the group hasn’t changed.  In fact, it should have gone down by around $400 per person ($3500 to 4500 times ten participants, divided among all 100 participants).  With fewer used vehicles in the ecosystem but the same number of buyers, the demand for used vehicles will go up, driving up the price of used vehicles.

So if you already own a used vehicle in that ecosystem it is only partially bad, because the value of your used car should be higher now.  It’s only a problem if you want to buy.  But I’m not sure this will help automakers beyond this year.  What effect will higher used-car values have on new car sales?  I think you could just as easily argue that it will hurt as much as it will help.

At any rate, it causes yet another economic bubble.  This program artificially inflates the market for car sales and makes adjustments to the ecosystem, based not on the GDP of the people in the ecosystem but on government intervention to make affordable a good that is less affordable if free market economics are left to do their thing.  The government tried this same tactic with the general housing market, and I think history shows that did not turn out too well.

So what we really have here is yet another government program with a dumb name, based on poor principles, with dubious economics at best, that you and I get to pay for.

It’s doubtful it will do anything but hurt us in the long term.  Which is why I’m considering participating.  I mean, if I have to pay for it anyway, I might as well get a new SUV and $4500 out of the deal.

What was the first car you ever rode in?  You know, the car that brought you home from the hospital after you were born? In my case, it was a 1970 Boss 302 Mustang that looked exactly like this one.

1970 Boss 302 Mustang = Awesome

This ruined me for life.

There wasn’t too much I could do about this while I was growing up.  I couldn’t afford my own car (or motorcycle) even after I was old enough to drive.  So mostly I would just ride my 20″ Redline around, in full aero tuck down big hills until that time I lost my balance, crashed, and broke my fall with my face.

Now as an grown-up, or at least an adult, silencing this addiction is much harder.  I’ve been to supercross races, motocross races, NASCAR races, ALMS races, World Superbike races, and AMA Superbike races before the Daytona Motorsports Group ruined it.  I watch every Formula One, World Superbike, and MotoGP race that gets televised.  This helps but doesn’t fully address the problem.

So about ten years ago, I bought myself a used 1988 Honda CRX Si with my annual bonus from IBM.  This car was not pretty at all.  But it was fun to drive, and pretty fast.  This really helped my addiction problem. Then the CRX died.  That was a sad, sad day.

I bought my 1998 Kawasaki KX-250 to feed the addiction.  And boy, it works.  My adrenaline rushes every time I throw my leg over and kick it started.  I shift into first, crack the throttle about 1/4 open, and release the clutch and that thing will climb through the gears just about as fast as I can shift.  What can compare to motorcycle acceleration? Nothing.  Well, a Ferrari, I guess, or a Corvette.  But I can’t afford a Ferrari – not yet, anyway. So yeah, my motorcycle will address this problem, except I never get to ride it.  It’s too hard to get enough free time all together to go ride.

So my addiction is not getting fed again. Which is why I test drove this.

2003 Nissan 350Z Track Model = Awesome

Boy, am I in trouble. My only hope is that someone buys it before I break down and get it myself.

P.S. I stole that picture from Innovative Motors, I hope they don’t mind too much.

Derrick and I went to the Cache Valley Cruise-In car show in Logan last Saturday with my dad and brother.  I used go to all the time, when I lived in Logan, but haven’t been for a while.  A definite must see for car buffs.

Which may or may not be Derrick, I’m not sure.  I asked Derrick if he wanted to come, and he said yes in a very convincing fashion.  But about halfway through the show he put on his pouting nothing-impresses-me-except-the-xbox frowny face.

As it ends up, what that really means is “I’m hungry.”  After a bit to eat he was back to enjoying the show again.

The hard thing about a show like this is that there are so many great cars, you find that you are walking right by a perfectly awesome car because you are focused on something else.  For example, we were so focused on this Cobra Replica that we didn’t even hardly notice a beautiful black Mustang Mach 1 Cobra Jet right next to it.

Shelby Cobra Replica. Does that really matter?

I have a real thing for old Camaros. 1967 and 1968 Camaros. It is a major problem. I don’t know what to do about it. You’d think that if I just got myself one it would address my problem, but I’d probably just keep sinking money into it.

Still, all I really want is a nice 1968 RS/SS Dana Camaro. Is that really too much to ask?

Anyway, they had some there.

Blown Black 1967

Red 1968 SS

Blown 1969 Z28

Black 1967 RS - Kinda like in the movie Better Off Dead

Of course there were a lot of great other cars. Here’s some of them – but honestly there were at least 30 others I should have taken a picture of that I didn’t.

Nice white Corvette. I think this one was a 1967.

When I was born I came home from the hospital in a 1970 Boss 302 Mustang. It was not like this one – it was stock. They had a stock one. I don’t know why I didn’t take a picture. But this one, despite not being stock, was pretty cool I had to admit.

You should never, ever do this to a perfectly good Boss Mustang. But if you are going to do it anyway, this is the way to do it. Wow.

30s Hot Rods are also cool.

Late 30s hot rod, a 1937 Ford I think

I think this is a 1934 Ford Coupe

Sweet Hiboy - I would love to build one of these someday

It is said that possessions alone do not make you happy. This is true; sometimes you find the happiness through other people’s possessions instead.

Another common belief about money is that the love of money is the root of all evil. This is also true – you should not love your money.

What you should do is give your money to Ferrari, in exchange for an F430. Or, make friends with someone who has a Ferrari, so their possessions can make you happy instead.

If you are like me, and you just can’t find anyone with a Ferrari to be friends with (or, can’t hide the superficiality of pretending to want to be friends with someone who has one already), the next best thing is to make friends with someone like Kyle who has a friend that will loan him his Ferrari F430 for the day in order to help Kyle complete his Halloween costume of “a successful person.”

And then, of course, you have to be selected for a ride. Gratefully Kyle stopped by my cube first thing after he got to work this morning and asked if I wanted to go for a ride. When I looked at him, he showed the Ferrari key, completing the thought. A ride in a Ferrari? Is there really any other answer to that question than an emphatic “Of course!”?

When I walked outside this is what I found – a beautiful silver-gray Ferrari F430 Spider:

We got in, carefully, and gingerly – getting in is a bit of a feat, especially if you are 6’2″. Kyle inserted the key, then pressed the starter button and that wonderful 480hp Ferrari V8 roared to life. We slowly pulled out of the parking lot here at Mozy and then onto the freeway.

If I had one of these, I might just drive it onto the freeway all day long, just pulling off so I could pull back on again.

This car is incredible. I must have said that ten times during the drive. The seats were incredibly comfortable; the side bolsters securely hold you in place, so much so that when going through corners you don’t even feel the lateral g forces. The car is firmly planted on the road with no body roll through corners. And hearing that Ferrari V8 climb through the gears as you click them off with the paddle shifter – wow.

We cruised along the freeway at what felt like a crawl but was actually around 80 mph.

If you look closely you can see that we are well below the 8500 rpm redline, but at near redline for most normal cars. The engine sounds so nice you just can’t think of shifting to a lower gear.

Oh, that black rectangle in the dash, pictured in the lower right corner? Yeah, that is the stereo. You don’t really use that thing in a Ferrari – it muffles the sound system in back, pictured here:

You can see the cool air ducts in this rear view mirror shot at speed, and even some of the jealous people around us on the freeway. When you are in a Ferrari, everyone else on the road is jealous.

We’re doing about 90 here, hoping to not find any cops. If I had this car, I don’t know how I would possibly avoid getting a ticket. It is so easy to take it up over 90; this car gets there before you know it, without even thinking about it. And it doesn’t even feel like you are going fast, other than the fact that you are blowing by everyone else on the road.

After leaving the freeway we went down into town to return to work via this nice curvy road called Pleasant Grove Boulevard. Speed limit on Pleasant Grove Boulevard is 40. We were taking those curves at 80 without even thinking about it. It didn’t even feel like we were pushing it at all. Simply amazing.

Um, yeah. That plaque says “28 Formula 1 World Titles.”

I didn’t get to drive this car myself. Oh, I wanted to. But it wasn’t loaned to me, it was loaned to Kyle. There’s no way I’d even ask. Besides, even just getting to ride in it was awesome, and enough.
Still, here’s a picture of me wearing a Ferrari. I think it looks pretty good on me.

That does it. Someday, someday…

A bone-stock Corvette ZR1 apparently just set a 7:26 time around Nurburgring, one of the fastest times ever by a production car. Check out the video:

Some time ago I started Project CRX, with the noble intention of acquiring and hopping up a second-generation Honda CRX and making a true thing of beauty. And I did the first part, way back in 1999 – I acquired a black 1988 Honda CRX Si with about 160,000 miles on it, for $1500. It was the fixing-up part that I failed to do, sadly. Still, I really – and I mean really – liked that car.

The Honda CRX was an unsung hero of automotive history, in my opinion. When they came out, I thought it would be the ideal commuter car – great gas mileage, small, agile, and fairly good performing. This lasted for four years, 1984-1987, the CRX’s first generation. Then came the second generation, with a much better looking body style and even better performance, especially if you got the Si. And if you fix them up – well, just look at the picture; need I say more?

My little black CRX was not a good looking car. The interior was shot, seats were torn, and there was a big hole in the dashboard where someone had stolen the stereo from the previous owner. Outside, there were a number of rusted panels, and the paint was faded in almost every place. The one upside was that the paint was such a dull, lifeless black that I’m pretty sure it absorbed all of the radar, and so I never got a speeding ticket.

Even worse was the fact that the driver side window did not really roll up and down easily. I tried to adjust the inner window tracks but I couldn’t get them to align properly. After I’d already spent the money to install a pretty decent stereo system, I was trying to roll the window up one time and in the process the window bound and shattered all over the place. I replaced it with a door from a junkyard, which was unfortunately white. Now I had a black CRX with a white driver-side door. I didn’t think it would matter much, because I always intended to paint it. I drove it that way for probably three years.

It may have been an ugly car, but it was a blast to drive. Even though it just had the stock D16 inline-4 that came with the Si, it had plenty of horsepower for the size of car, and I really loved to drive it – so much, in fact, that I didn’t really care what it looked like.

I put 50,000 miles on that car and was pretty pleased with the fact that it had over 200,000 miles on it. I even did get the chance to install an AEM intake and a Greddy cat-back exhaust on it. Even with 200,000 miles on it, I was getting 44 miles to the gallon on the highway at 75 mph.

One of my best memories in that car was driving home by myself along this back road to my home called River Bottom Road. I was taking the road at roughly twice the posted speed limit as it wound around the curves following the river and the hillsides bordering the river bottoms. Like always, my CRX went exactly where it was pointed as fast as it could. It was like driving that road in a go-kart. Days like that were almost like the car’s gift to me for taking care of it.

One day Todd and I were going golfing and were on the freeway, about one mile from the golf course, when the CRX just died. It shut off right there on the freeway at 70 mph. I coasted over to the side of the road, tried to restart the car but it wouldn’t start. After several futile attempts, I called a tow truck and had it towed home.

Later that day I went out and tried to start the car again, but still no luck. I decided to start by pulling the plugs to see if they were sparking, thinking that perhaps the distributor need replacing. As I pulled the first plug out I saw that it was covered in oil. It ended up that two of the four plugs were completely coated in engine oil when I pulled them from their sockets.

At that point I knew my CRX had died a catastrophic death. Either the oil had leaked in through the head, requiring a new head, or the oil had leaked past the piston rings, which would require a completely new rebuild. My CRX was dead. It was a very, very sad day.

My intention all along had been to eventually swap a B16 or (ideally) an LS-VTEC into my CRX. At that time, however, I did not have nearly the coin for such a swap, and couldn’t afford to go without a car. I had to let the CRX go for basically nothing.

Since then I’ve been driving my 2002 Grand Prix. It’s not been a bad car, not at all. But it doesn’t offer the fun that the CRX did. And now, with gas prices where they are, I’m thinking it might be a good time to get another CRX, which would not only help me save money in gasoline but also be a dang good time to drive again. Since I’m now driving about twice as far to get to Mozy as I had to to get to Novell, it seems like a reasonable idea.

So we’re back to the beginning again, Project CRX Part Deux. As before, the first task will be to acquire a CRX. I’m going to be a bit more picky than before. Here’s what I’m looking for:

• Second-generation (1988-1991) Honda CRX.
• Preferably an Si, and in particular I’m not all that interested in an HF.
• It should be in drivable condition and must pass inspection and emissions tests.
• Ideally it should already have the B16 or LS-VTEC swap done. If not, it pretty much has to have a ZC or D16 in it.
• I’d like the body to be in really good condition – no rust would be great.

Just about anything else I can deal with. For example, I can deal with a suboptimal interior. I can deal with little to no stereo system. I can deal with lame wheels and tires. I can deal with faded, worn, scratched, or chipped paint as long as there is little to no rust.

I’m not willing to sink a lot of money into one of these, because with the age who knows how much money I’ll end up putting into it anyway. But I’ll keep the blog updated, because if I find a deal that can work for me, perhaps I’ll be initiating Project CRX Part Deux.

(Image credit: explicitspeedperformance.net via Google)